Former husband Jimmy Gulzar of Scary Spice Melanie B talked to UK tabloid The Sun last week about reasons for the downfall of their marriage. After Melanie got the boob job that Jimmy alleges, he then lost respect for her for doing it in secrecy knowing he was against it and refused to have sex with her. Melanie called Jimmy gay and pathetic in attempts to get him to have sex with her. Jimmy says that allegations of him being gay or bisexual are "beneath contempt". He says:
"It's not that I couldn't. It's purely that I wouldn't. She'd hurt me very badly. She had betrayed me, she'd lied to me. I was too angry with Mel to even contemplate making love with her. For me, if my head ain't right, my willy ain't right. And Mel had completely done my head in with her lies. Mel has destroyed me once by ending our marriage. She seems intent on destroying me again and I don't understand why. Mel begged and pleaded with me to make love to her but I refused. The truth is I didn't want to have sex with her. I wouldn't have gone near her with a barge pole after the way she betrayed me. I was too angry with her to even contemplate making love with her. It drove her mad that she couldn't bend my will, that I didn't come running when she snapped her fingers. Sex was the only thing I had total control over and the only way I had left of saying 'No' to Mel. I have never taken Viagra and nor did she ever suggest I should. I didn't need to. And the cheap insinuation that I'm bisexual or gay is beneath contempt. We have a daughter together, for God's sake. I can categorically state now, for the record, that I have never, ever had any kind of sexual relations with a man. I cannot believe Mel has stooped this low. She has left me no option but to defend myself in public."
"Mel flew to Los Angeles and had a breast enhancement operation which she kept secret from me until it was already done. Mel knew I was dead against it because it meant she would no longer be able to breast-feed Phoenix. I felt Phoenix should come first. I wanted her to be strong and healthy and all the advice was that breast milk is best. Mel and I had discussed it and she knew I felt she should put being a mum first. We argued about it but I was adamant, and believed Mel was in agreement.""Mel wanted to take Phoenix with her but I wouldn't let her. We had a massive bust-up about it. I couldn't understand how Mel could possibly work and look after Phoenix at the same time. Phoenix was just a tiny baby and still taking milk from the breast. I didn't want my precious baby in the hands of a stranger while Mel was busy working. It meant I had to wean Phoenix on to a bottle because Mel was determined to go to LA, with or without Phoenix. I soon found out why. She called me a couple of days later. She said, 'You know what Jimmy, I've just had a boob job. I didn't tell you 'cos I knew you'd go mad.' She told me she had just come round from the anaesthetic and was sitting up in bed in the clinic. What could I say? I was concerned for her, not only because she'd had the operation but also because she had lied to me. I was worried about her state of mind, about why she had felt the need to go ahead and do it. I loved Mel for being Mel, not because of the way she looked. And I felt she needed reassurance. So I said, 'Well, OK, are you safe? Is everything cool?' I told her, 'Mel, you don't have to lie to me. I love you. We can work it out.' We talked, it was emotional. She said the op was for her. It made her feel sexy. I accepted it. I felt we had sorted it and when Mel returned home I hoped we could put it behind us."
And allegedly a few weeks later Melanie went back for another boob job.. Jimmy continues:
"I was devastated. And, inside, I was very very angry. I felt completely betrayed and hurt that Mel had lied to me a second time. It was the beginning of the end of our sex life. I was seething with resentment about it all and couldn't forgive her the lie. I felt very hurt and confused. I couldn't get my head round why she had done it and the anger built and built. There were other tensions in our marriage and we had begun to row constantly. It got to the point where I couldn't bear to have sex with Mel. I just refused point blank. She was used to getting her own way, to snapping her fingers and having men fall at her feet. And it drove her mad that I was the only man who wouldn't come running. It struck at the heart of her because she couldn't understand. She felt rejected, probably for the first time in her life. At first, Mel was just hurt and bewildered. She kept asking, 'What is it? Don't you love me, Jim? Don't you fancy me?' She couldn't get her head round the fact that I didn't want to make love to her when I was angry, and I felt angry most of the time because of the way she was treating me."
"There was already tremendous tension between us, building up like a pressure cooker, because of arguments about our relationship. I was unhappy Mel was going out so much, leaving me at home alone with Phoenix. She'd go out in the evening, return in the early hours of the morning, sleep all day, get up and go straight out again. Sometimes I'd go out with her. But 90 per cent of the time I remained at home with our baby, because I chose to. I loved being a dad, I'd always wanted a child. I knew Mel needed her freedom. She had become very insecure while pregnant about her image and sexiness. She would have down days when she'd say to me, 'Do you think I'll still be Scary Spice when I've had the baby? Do you think it's going to change me'? She'd be in floods of tears, saying she couldn't cope with the pressure any more, that she just wanted a normal life, to live in the country and be a mum. I felt it was her hormones talking and I'd put my arms around her and tell her everything would be OK, we'd work things out."
"She felt lost. She'd sit crying in my arms and it would all come pouring out. She'd say, 'I can't take it any more, Jim. I hate this life,it's just too much pressure. She also sobbed about Geri and said, 'We were real friends. I don't understand why she did that to me. Why didn't she tell me, Jim? I really trusted her. What did I do to deserve that?' It threw Mel off balance, made her question what she was doing. She was very confused and emotional. Other times she'd rage, 'That's it - I've had enough. I'm gonna fucking quit.' Any little thing could set her off, a change in the schedule, a car being five minutes late. I'd sit her down and tell her, 'Mel, quit if you want to, it doesn't matter to me. But just think about it for a while, just calm down.' We'd sit for a while and her anger would subside. She'd start to cry and I'd hold her and tell her I loved her, that I'd always be there for her, that nothing would change that."
Jimmy said Mel became more insecure after Phoenix was born:
"She was anxious that nobody should think she had changed, that she was still Scary Spice and could still be wild. But more than anything she needed to prove that to herself. She'd say to me, 'I'm scared of losing myself, Jim. Am I still Scary Spice, am I still her?' I'd reassure her as best I could. I tried to understand. I knew Mel worked incredibly hard and she'd carried our baby for nine months. I felt she deserved some space, some time to herself. So when she told me she needed to go out with her friends, to unwind and relax, I was cool about it. I was happy to stay at home. I was content. I loved being with Phoenix. As a dancer, I'd travelled the world and done my share of partying. For me, being a dad was the best thing that ever happened to me. But Mel's partying began to worry me. At first, I was pleased she was enjoying herself. I wanted her to be happy. I loved her. She was going out a couple of times a week with Noel Gallagher's wife Meg Mathews and her crowd and just having a good time. But then it was three or four times a week. I'd fall asleep with Phoenix and by the time I saw Mel again, it was as she was about to go out again for the night."
"We'd only been married six months and I trusted Mel. She was my wife and I loved her absolutely. But after a month of her partying I'd had enough. I couldn't see where it would end. We had barely seen each other for weeks because she was always out on the town. I felt it was time for her to be a bit more responsible, to invest some time and energy in me, Phoenix and family. I told her, 'Mel, you've had a month of caning it. What are we going to do now? Are we going to do stuff together or keep doing stuff apart?' She went off into a massive one. She shouted, 'You are trying to change me, trying to pin me down. You don't really love me. This is the way I am. Marriage shouldn't have to change me.' From that moment on we rowed almost daily, often about the most trivial things.
"We'd go out for a meal and Mel's behaviour would do my head in. I hated the way she treated people. She was so rude. Snapping her fingers at waiters, never saying please or thank you, snapping at her driver. It became a major problem between us. I told her she didn't have any respect for people, that the way she behaved was ignorant and embarrassed me. I said, 'Just because they don't have a lot of money doesn't mean they don't deserve respect.' It was a fundamental issue because in my eyes it called into question her respect for me. Mel did try to change and acted more polite. But the rows still got worse. She felt I didn't accept her for the way she was. I felt she didn't respect me, that she preferred to party with her starry pals rather than be at home with her family. We argued and never reached a compromise. Mel didn't believe in compromise. She didn't see why she should have to. She blamed me for everything. She accused me of being possessive, jealous and resentful of her success. She said I was trying to control her, to turn her into something she wasn't. She'd scream, 'You married me when I was Scary Spice. You knew the way it was'."
"There I was, living in a new country in a house in the middle of the countryside where I didn't know a soul. I was constantly warned not to speak to anyone outside Mel's friends in case they betrayed secrets. So I had no real friends of my own. I was married for the first time and a dad for the first time, it was a shake. I was lonely, confused, a little intimidated by it all. And on top of that, I was married to a world-famous woman. I needed my wife to be there for me as I had emotional needs, too. But for Mel it was only ever me, me, me. What I wanted or needed didn't count. When I tried to explain she was totally unsympathetic and told me, 'You should consider yourself lucky - you should be grateful.' Our sex life had already begun to dwindle after Phoenix was born, naturally, the way it does for a while in most marriages after a new baby. But it got to the point where I just didn't want to make love to Mel anymore. We had dreadful rows about it that never got resolved. She'd say, 'You can't love me if you won't make love to me.' I'd explain it didn't feel right for me as there was too much tension between us. Mel was very hurt. She needed the comfort and reassurance of sex but I wouldn't give it to her. She'd constantly ask, 'Is it because you don't fancy me now I've had a baby? Is it because I'm not sexy anymore?' Or she'd say, 'You don't love me, do you? You don't care about me anymore.' Then she'd get angry and spiteful and taunt me by saying, 'You can't make me feel like a real woman. You're pathetic, you must be gay. You're not a real man.'"
"But each put-down and each row just made me angrier and more resolute. I didn't want to go near her. I now think I was using sex as a weapon because I was so hurt, too. All I knew at the time is she was the last person I wanted sex with. We always slept together but our bed was the size of four doubles and we often ended up sleeping back to back on opposite sides." Mel finally insisted on calling in a counsellor. Malcolm Kirsch, from London's world-renowned Hale Clinic, made secret visits to the couple's mansion where he counselled them for six weeks. Jimmy said: "Mel was totally convinced I was to blame for all our problems. I didn't want a counsellor at first. I felt we could sort things out between us by spending some time together, talking calmly and getting back in touch with the way we felt for each other. But Mel couldn't accept she was responsible for any of our problems and said a counsellor would say that, too. That's why she insisted on calling him in, because she wanted to hear him blame it all on me. Not because she genuinely believed there was a shared problem. She wanted to justify herself and prove a point. But it didn't work out that way of course. We talked endlessly about the way we both felt. It was very painful. I never believed we couldn't rescue the marriage. I never gave up trying. But Mel never got off the starting blocks when it came to healing the rift."
Jimmy talks about the beginning of their relationship:
"Mel was determined to get me into bed. But I held back, I didn't want a shabby little fling. I liked Mel, I felt something special between us and I treated her with kid gloves. I realised that she was really just an insecure little girl with a big mouth. It was clear that she was used to getting what she wanted. And she wanted me, but I wasn't gonna fall into bed with her for the hell of it. I had respect for her as a person, and for myself. I saw her as Mel, the vulnerable girl she was, not Scary Spice. I felt tender towards her, felt love for her quickly. She needed somebody to trust. I wanted it to be me. I didn't want to risk our friendship for the sake of meaningless sex. I'm not the kind of guy who thinks it's big or clever to bed someone just because they're famous. I'm not impressed by that kind of thing. The day we first met, on a professional basis, I walked in and she said to the other girls, 'Wow, mine's sexy isn't he?' I gave her a hard stare. I thought, 'What do you mean - mine?' I didn't like the attitude. She was very flirtatious from then on and made it clear she fancied me but in a sweet way, not an 'in your face' way. When we were rehearsing, she'd rub against me just a bit too hard, let her touch linger when she didn't need to. She'd pay me compliments every day and borrow things from me, hats usually, and make a big deal about returning them to me in my room. But I never took advantage of it."
I really liked her. She touched my heart. Of course I fancied her, but not just as a one-night stand. I knew I was falling in love with Mel. I just didn't know if she felt the same way. And I didn't want to be just another sexual conquest. We had become very close. It was a mind thing. We felt the same about things, thought the same way. We'd spend most of our time together after gigs, chatting, chatting, chatting. She'd come to my room or I would go to hers and we'd lie, fully clothed, on the bed and literally just talk all night long, life, the universe, everything. It wasn't until we reached Spain during the tour that Mel and I slept together, and even then we didn't have sex. We had been partying with the rest of the Spice Girls after the gig had finished and had a great laugh. It was about 3am when I left to return to my hotel room. I got back and Mel rang me almost immediately. We chatted for a while about the evening, then Mel said, 'You know what Jimmy? I'm coming to your room.' It was in a teasing way and, anyway, I was pleased. I wanted to see her. I had a twin-bedded room and Mel lay on one bed while I lay on the other. We talked, as usual, for a while before Mel said, 'I'm getting into bed with you.' I said, 'Come on, then, come for a cuddle.' I wanted to hold her. We both still had our clothes on and got into the bed like that. It felt right to take things slowly, to build trust. She lay her head on my chest. We cuddled and kissed for the first time and then fell asleep like that. It was cute. And I already knew what I felt for her was way, way above sex."
"We both knew something special was happening, there was a deep bond growing between us, but neither of us wanted to say it. It was early days and the feelings between us were intense. We both wanted to make sure they were real. Funnily enough, of all the places in the world we could have chosen, Mel and I ended up first making love in a single bed in a poky Paris hotel room. It was my room, Mel was staying at a different, much posher hotel. But we had a day off and returned to my hotel because there were less people around. And we talked honestly about the way we felt for each other and whether we should have sex. We were both worried about the implications of starting a serious relationship. Me, because I was an employee, Mel because she was a Spice Girl. Our relationship might become public before we had a chance to see if it was going to work. The conversation came as freely and naturally as any other. There was nothing we could not discuss together by then. We got into the bed the way we usually did but we both already knew this time would be different."
"The sex itself was nothing special, just normal, healthy, tender, passionate love-making. It was afterwards that was really special. We both knew something deep had passed between us. It was like having a revelation. We both looked at each other for a long while, surprised, slightly shyly, without speaking and grinning from ear to ear. It was as if we both instinctively knew this was going to be it. We didn't need words then. Later, we talked. We both felt we had become soulmates."
"Mel was the one who raised the subject of marriage, not me. She was persistent. She liked the idea of being married and having children. And so did I. We talked about it constantly, what we wanted from life, from each other, what our expectations were. We had skipped the courting stage because of the intensity of our feelings and needed to get to know each other. But I knew I was in love with her and it blew my mind that she felt the same way. It was so good between us. So I proposed to her, formally, while we were in Paris. I went down on bended knee in a restaurant and presented her with a custom-made diamond and emerald ring. I'd secretly had a friend make it and fly it over from England. It was so lovely and we were so happy. It was bliss, like walking on a cloud for both of us, the kind of feeling that just makes you want to grin when you wake up in the morning."
Jimmy then talked about how it was after they were married:
"There were three people in our marriage: me, Mel and her mum Andrea. And it was one of the major problems which wrecked our relationship. From the moment we discovered Mel was pregnant, her mum tried to turn her against me. I remember the day that Mel and I found out she was expecting. It was July 1998, and we were in New York on the first leg of the Spice Girls' tour. Mel kept being sick. At first, we thought she was ill. We had discussed starting a family while we were in France, a couple of weeks after I'd proposed. We both desperately wanted a baby and, since we were already planning our wedding, didn't see any point in waiting. Mel decided to stop using her contraception and I agreed. But neither of us could believe she had fallen pregnant that quickly. We thought she had a stomach bug but the sickness didn't clear up, it got worse, to the point where Mel needed a bucket behind the stage when the band was performing. It went on for about a week when Mel turned to me and said, 'Jim, I think I might be pregnant.' All the signs were there. We were both very excited. Mel had kept testing to see if she was pregnant from the day we had decided to try for a baby in Cannes. She tested so constantly that I asked her to stop buying kits. But this time, the test was positive. Mel was really nervous, couldn't believe it was true. I was ecstatic but trying to keep a lid on it, just in case the test was wrong. We immediately rang round and found a private doctor in New York who could see us that day. Mel got Vernon, her most trusted and loyal bodyguard, to take us to the clinic in secret. The doctor confirmed that Mel was pregnant. We were so happy, grinning and hugging each other. We were blown away. Mel's mum, who had come to visit, was staying in the same New York hotel and Mel couldn't wait to get back to break the news, rushing straight off to tell her as soon as we returned."
"But within a few minutes, Mel came flying into our room, sobbing her heart out. 'What's wrong, what's the matter?' I asked her. I was stunned when Mel blurted out, 'My mum says I shouldn't marry you because you don't love me.' I was completely taken aback. I said, 'What is she talking about? What's going on?' and I asked Mel for her mum's room number. I rang Andrea and said, 'I'm coming down to see you. Mel's in tears. I want to sort this out.' Mel came with me. We sat down and I said to her mum, 'So, what's the problem?' Andrea launched into a tirade, saying she didn't believe I loved Mel, questioning me on my religious beliefs, saying she didn't want us to have a church wedding. I was speechless. I said, 'How can you say I don't love Mel, what do you base that on?' We went round and round in circles until, eventually, she said, 'I think you should sign a pre-nuptial agreement. Why don't you?' I was furious and incredibly insulted. I said, 'Because that is not the way I see marriage and because Mel hasn't asked me.' We had never discussed it. It was never an issue. Her mum said, 'Well I think you should. Will you?' And I said no."
"I was offended, hurt and very angry. I didn't want to start having a go at Andrea, she was Mel's mum and I respected that and understood she was trying to protect her daughter. But I was still appalled. Mel said nothing and we returned to our room. For a while, the bond between us became stronger. We clung to each other for support. But gradually, it began to gnaw at Mel. She would ask the same questions over and over again, 'Do you really love me? Why do you love me? How much do you love me?' Mel was pregnant, she was on tour, she was emotional and exhausted. I tried to be reassuring but eventually it got to me. We ended up having a blazing row when Mel told me, 'My mum doesn't think you are good enough for me. She thinks I should marry someone famous.' Mel said her mum believed I was just after her money and asked me, 'Wouldn't it just make things easier if you signed a pre-nuptial agreement?'
"That was it. I lost my rag completely and said, 'If that's the way you feel Mel, let's just call the whole wedding off. I've had enough. I love you, but I can't cope with this. If you'd asked me, I would have. But I'm not doing it for your mother.' I rang and arranged for a ticket for the following day for a flight back to Amsterdam. It meant I had to walk out of the tour but I didn't care. I went out that night and got totally pissed. Mel was frantic when I returned, because I hadn't told her where I was going. We sat down next morning and talked. Both of us had calmed down. It had been our first row, and it wasn't going to be the last. We kissed and made up. I told Mel, 'I am not forcing you to marry me. You can walk away if you want to...' But Mel did love me, passionately. And I loved her deeply. I felt we were soulmates. So did she. I never wanted my marriage to end, and I believe there's a chance that Mel and I would still be together if her mother hadn't kept sticking her knife into me."
Jimmy talks about Max Beesley & Mel:
"I would have done anything to save my marriage and believed that's what Mel wanted, too. She told me the only way was for me to move out and give her some breathing space. She said she wanted to try to pick up the pieces by us going out on dates again. But she just wanted to move another man into our bed. I'd met him[Max Beesley] at a party. He seemed like a nice guy. But a few weeks after they began working on the album I went to pick Mel up from the studio. There was a weird vibe and I noticed that when Max said goodbye he hugged Mel just a little too tight, a little too long. It concerned me but I dismissed it because I trusted my wife. But he had the hots for Mel and moved in on her after she confided to him that we were having marriage problems. I went to Holland to visit my mum in November last year, to give Mel some space before we set off to Thailand to try to patch up our marriage. We were due to leave on Boxing Day, the tickets were already booked, and I wanted a chance for the tensions to simmer down before we left. We were rowing constantly and both felt we needed some time apart to think. I'd been there a day or two when Mel rang. I could hear loud music and people talking in the background. I asked, 'What's that noise, Mel, are you having a party?' She said, 'It's nothing. I've just got a couple of friends round.'"
"But I was uneasy, suspicious. So I returned home the next day. I asked her about the party again and who had been there. She named a couple of her girlfriends, that's all. Later that day, I needed some loose change and opened a kitchen drawer where Mel kept a wallet full of spare coins. Two photographs fell out, both of Mel standing in our kitchen, smiling at Max Beesley. I never even knew he had been to our home and Mel had never told me. My heart began to beat just that little bit faster but I didn't say anything to Mel. As I returned to the sitting room I noticed a video lying near the TV. I'm a big film fan and had loads of videos. I knew this one didn't belong to me. It was unlabelled so I played it out of curiosity mostly. There, staring out at me, was Max. It was a tape of one of his TV programmes. Later that night, after Mel and I got into bed, she mentioned the video and asked if I wanted to watch it with her. I felt sick inside but kept cool and just said, 'No, I'd rather sleep.' My mind was racing. I suspected Mel was having an affair with Max but couldn't prove it. I was torn with the knowing but not knowing, between wanting to ask her and fearing the answer."
"The next morning, when I woke up, I felt something stuck to my leg. I reached down and discovered it was a torn condom wrapper. I knew it wasn't mine, Mel and I hadn't had sex for weeks. We had some cushions on a sofa in our bedroom. They had bondage scenes printed on the front and a pocket which held a single condom. I walked over and checked them. When I left for Holland, each pocket was full, I'd filled them. Now there was one condom missing. I confronted Mel and we had a blazing row. I said, 'You've been having sex with Max in our bed, haven't you?' Mel totally denied it and said the condom must have been used by her sister. I said, 'Why would Danielle be in our bed?' We had an eight-bedroom mansion. Mel couldn't think of an answer and started screaming abuse instead. She kept denying it. She said, 'I'd never do that Jimmy, never. I'm not having an affair with Max.' She wept and ranted."
"I left it. There was nothing else I could do. But I kept begging her to tell me the truth. And she kept insisting there was nothing to tell. 'You're paranoid,' she said, 'I thought you loved me. Don't you trust me?' I said to him[Max], 'Man to man, please just tell me if there's anything between you and Mel.' Max said, 'No Jim, I'm a Buddhist. I'd never sleep with another man's wife. It's bad karma. But I know you and Mel are having problems because she told me.' I didn't believe him. I said, 'I want you to stay out of my marriage.' And he insisted again, 'I'm not in your marriage.' I thanked him. But just before the conversation ended he said a strange thing. He said, 'But Jim, you know, if three years from now, if something has happened, are you going to shake my hand?' His words cut through my heart like a knife. I knew he was sleeping with my wife, the mother of my child. It was just a matter of time before I could prove it."
"We'd agreed we'd celebrate Christmas in Thailand and not bother to get a tree or stuff as we were flying out on Boxing Day. But on Christmas morning Mel announced, 'You're not coming to Thailand. I'm taking Danielle instead. I want to separate. I want to see how it goes.' Some friends and her family began to arrive. There were loads of presents for everyone. The only person Mel hadn't bought a single gift for was me. Later, she made a phone call. She was giggling and whispering into the handset, flirty stuff. She didn't know I could hear her but I guessed who it was. When Mel finished I pressed the re-dial button. Max answered and I hung up. We only had a chance to talk later. Mel said the only way to save our marriage was for me to move out, to give her some space. She said, 'I'll get you a flat in London. We can go on dates again and see how it goes from there.' I wanted to sit it out and fight for our marriage together. But Mel was insistent the only way we had a chance was for me to move out. She said, 'If you don't do what I ask, you are not a man. You don't respect me.' I agreed I'd do what she wanted. I loved Mel and was desperate to save our marriage."
"I begun flat-hunting. She rang me before she boarded the plane. She was in tears and said, 'I love you so much Jimmy, when I come back we will try again.' I didn't hear from her again until she rang three days later and said, 'I want a divorce.' I was shocked. I asked her, 'What are you saying? But she just said, 'Get legal advice Jimmy,' and hung up. That's when I rang Max and asked if he was having an affair with Mel. He flatly denied it and even laughed. I did take advice and was told not to move out of the house. But I did anyway before Mel returned from Thailand. I'd agreed to do it and felt it was important to keep my word. I still hoped Mel and I might have a chance. I spoke to her when she returned about seeing Phoenix. She flatly refused. Then in February I saw pictures of her and Max on holiday together in Barbados. I was gutted and knew then for certain she was cheating.
Jimmy said he rang Mel on her mobile and MAX answered:
"I said, 'What's going down, Max?' Even then he tried to deny it. He said, 'It's not the way it looks, Jimmy.' I said, 'Don't bother lying any more. She's my bloody wife, let me speak to her.' and I started cussing him. That's when he sneered at me and told me he was her man now. I haven't spoken to Mel since."
Jimmy talks about how things are after the two split:
"Mel doesn't even deliver Phoenix to my door, never has, not once. She gets a friend or chauffeur to drop her off and pick her up. It's terrible, seeing her in the arms of a string of different people, crying because she has got to leave her Daddy and wants to know where her Mummy is. Mel has already tried to make it difficult between me and Phoenix. She refused point-blank to let me see my daughter after they returned from the Christmas break to Thailand. She wouldn't even let me see Phoenix while she was romping around in Barbados with her lover last February. Instead, she left Phoenix with her 19-year-old sister Danielle and I had to phone the Spice Girls' office to find out where my own daughter was. My birthday falls on February 18, but Mel even refused to let me see Phoenix for a couple of hours then. My lawyers had to arrange access through the court. Mel has constantly mucked me around, not turning up on time with Phoenix, or swapping dates at the last minute to fit in with her plans. All I care about is Phoenix. I'm the one who looked after her while Mel went travelling and partying. I've always been there for Phoenix, and always will be. I love her to bits. I'm determined I won't let Mel turn Phoenix against me, though I'm certain she'll try." Jimmy talks about the money he gets from Mel now, and his future:
"The allowance was sorted by lawyers, it has nothing to do with Mel being kind or reasonable. I'm looking for work, I've taken an intense course of acting classes and have been to several film auditions thanks to my new management Can International. But Mel knows a lot of people in the business. It's made it difficult for me. I've spoken out purely to defend myself and set the record straight. Mel is in a position to give Phoenix virtually anything, and it would be easy to turn a little girl's head if her Daddy couldn't even give her a bed for the night."